152863

Joke of the Day

"You don't have to like me. I'm not a Facebook status.."

"Why do giraffes have a great love life? Because they keep a good distance between their brains and their heart."

"Your mom is like a shotgun. Two cocks and she's ready to blow."

"3-year-old: There's a spider on the carpet! Me: Haha, that's just a piece of fuzz. *fuzz moves* Me: EVERYBODY OUT OF THE HOUSE!"

"Why did they fire Victoria? Was she keeping secrets? What is Victoria's Secret?"

"I just won $1,000,000, and I've decided to give a quarter to charity. Now I have $999,999.75."

"After the Swiss Idol, a Bern resident was found dead in his home."

"""I don't understand the value in seeing a therapist."" - People who haven't spent time with me yet."

"Q: Why did the blond quit his restroom attendant job? A: He couldn't figure out how to refill the hand dryer!"

"You can only push me so far before I breakdance."