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Joke of the Day

"Man, the frappes at the grinder place by the rotary are wicked good. Go Sox! Sorry about that. I had 2 Boston Kreme donuts this morning."

"I Just Opened An Abortion Clinic.. No fetus can defeat us"

"My friend gave me a balloon and told me not to pop it.. but I blew it!"

"I can touch every animal's toes except the camel's. Doing that gets me arrested."

"""To be is to do"" - Socrates. ""To do is to be"" - Nietzsche. ""Do be do be do"" - Sinatra. ""Beep beep beep"" - R2D2."

"2 people got in an argument on the other side of the makeshift boat i'm on. So I yelled, what's with all the Rift-Raft over there!?"

"The sincerest form of flattery is having a robot from the future sent back in time to kill you. Imitation is a distant second."

"This year's the year of the rooster, so I ate chicken. Next year's the year of the dog."

"What kind of shoes do pedophiles wear? White vans"

"I hate it when I accidentally grab two pieces of pizza and then have to eat the whole thing to keep it even."