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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a pedophile and a pro golfer? A pedophile always finishes in under 18 holes."

"My friend told me that she wanted to give me a deep throat blow job today. ""Really!?"" I asked. ""No,"" she replied, ""April Fogarbnsrgabsjg...."" That'll teach her to try to be funny..."

"I like to think I'm pretty smart. I just managed to get a 90 on my iq test."

"I feel bad for kids who see toys on the television but can't order it cause their parents have to be over 18 to call.."

"I can make you speak Irish Say ""Whale oil beef hooked"" quickly"

"What becomes packed between periods? School Hallways"

"The first woman on the Moon... ""Houston, we have a problem."" ""What?"" ""Never mind."" ""What's the problem?"" ""Nothing."" ""Please tell us?"" ""You know what the problem is."""

"Name the only building in the world with 80,000 stories The library (My 6yo told me to tweet this)"

"What is the name of a bag pipe band that likes to play while jumping on squares? hopscotts."

"In Hell, all of your Google searches post directly to your social media accounts."