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Joke of the Day
"What's Shaking? Not Ali...."
Next Joke
"In April of 1620, it rained. That same year, the Pilgrims arrived. I suppose the saying is true. April showers bring Mayflowers."
"*wakes up early on weekend *makes 12 pancakes *wakes kids up ""Daddy, can we have waffles today???"" *eats 12 pancakes"
"Men are like horoscopes. They always tell you what to do and are usually wrong."
"So I ran into a guy named Juan Williams yesterday... Isn't he the guy who wrote the music for Star Juars?"
"I'm going through a phase of categorizing my life in phases. I call this one my 'phase' phase."
"Ever heard of the ""door knocker""? No? It doesn't ring a bell?"
"What does Brock Lesnar do if a website isn't loading? He gives it an F5"
"The best answer to an American Apparel salesperson asking you if you're looking for anything specific is, ""the bottom half of a shirt."""
"Got myself a Microsoft advent calendar but I'm worried that once I've opened 3 or 4 windows I won't be able to open any more..."