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Joke of the Day

"Sean Spicer said the inauguration had the ""largest audience ever."" Then he took it back because your mother left."

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"Why was the 40 degree angle so nice to the 50 degree angle? Because its very complementary!"
"When is a farmer like a magician? When he turns his cow into pasture."
"I don't see the point of strip clubs. All they do is frustrate you and take all your money. I have a wife for that."
"What do you get if you cross Oddjob with Blofeld? Oddfeld..."
"We often criticize pedophiles... but they, at least, drive slowly near schools."
"""Always give your food a rinse before you eat it,"" my dad always used to say. Lovely man. Made terrible sandwiches."
"Why do women find the guy in 50 Shades of Grey sexy? beats me"
"I kicked a French guy in the balls... Once, I kicked a French guy in the balls. As he clutched his groin and sank to the floor, he whispered in pain, ""wee wee"". So I kicked him again."
"what cross road chicken"
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