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Joke of the Day

"What do you call someone who is afraid of Santa? ""Claus-trophobic"""

"I don't celebrate Valentine's Day ever since I took a girl out for heart shaped pizza and I realized it was smaller than normal pizza."

"Even Al Qaeda is like ""These ISIS guys are a bit much no?"""

"Why don't girls count to two? Because they ""can't even."""

"What is ye difference between a porcupine and a porsche? The pricks are in the inside of the Porsche."

"What's 5,000 lbs and sexually confused? A Bi-noceros"

"I was in a near-sex experience. My wife flashed before my eyes."

"Which African country has the most obese inhabitants? Burkina Fatso"

"Murphy said to his daughter ""I want you home by eleven o'clock."" She said ""But Father I'm no longer a child!"" He said ""I know that's why I want you home by eleven."""

"What's the difference between a 4WD and a rental car? A rental car can drive anywhere."