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Joke of the Day
"What do you call someone who is afraid of Santa? ""Claus-trophobic"""
Next Joke
"I told my son I was an early adopter. He asked, what tech? Then it got weird."
"Is a guy eating peach halves the equivalent of a chick eating a banana? Asking for a friend... ...but hurry up, I'm almost to the checker"
"Never forget. Never forget that Americans can't even get the date the right way around. Sincerely the rest of the world on 9/11."
"What are Aladdin's least favourite biscuits Jaffar Cakes"
"They demolished my local Domino's Pizza shop... yesterday, and then all the other shops on the street fell down."
"What is Hillary Clinton's favorite dice game? Benghahtzee."
"*arouses suspicion* Suspicion: I have a boyfriend. But c'mere."
"Me: How many legs does the dog have? 4 y.o: Five Me: There's something wrong with your counting. 4: There's something wrong with the dog."
"[goes to sign up for course on how to handle bad news better] ""sorry, we're full"" [lights myself on fire]"