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Joke of the Day

"A couple orders a pie at a luxury restaurant The husband eats 4/7 of the pie and the wife the rest. He paid 4.5$ more than her. How much did the pie cost? Answer in comments"

"What do you get when you cross a penis and a potato? A dictator ha....ha.......I'll be leaving now"

"How do you make sure man will never find something? Name it clit."

"Doctor Patient 2 Doctor:What happened to you ? PATIENT:I am going to die in a minute. DOCTOR:wait I am coming with in five minutes."

"I had a dream last night that I was a muffler... I woke up exhausted."

"Women want men they can fix; men want girls they can save; I want a sandwich that makes itself."

"Did you hear about the bureaucrat who was a Platonist? They were really obsessed with forms."

"This oatmeal tastes like I'm gonna need a doughnut."

"For some people, blood on the toothbrush is a sign of gum disease.... ...But for me it's a sign of a healthy abortion."

"I just saved 57 dollars on my groceries without a single coupon. Self checkouts are awesome."