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Joke of the Day

"NYC parks department on naked Trump statue: ""NYC Parks stands firmly against any unpermitted erection in city parks, no matter how small."""

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"If a glow worm were to have its tail cut off ... ... would it be de-lighted?"
"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I have never wanted to have a garbanzo bean in my mouth."
"A drunk driver crashed into a school bus full of kids the other day, but it's ok. All the injuries were minor."
"When I see crate of kittens in a pet store I think ""oh a crazy cat lady starter kit!"""
"Have you heard that some bad dogs are running around burning down dog-houses? It's a rash of arfson."
"I don't get why the people in the twin towers were upset on 9/11... I mean, the workers did get razes."
"Me: ..and a small sprite. McDonald's Girl: Want a large? All sizes are only $.99 Me: I ASKED FOR SMALL YOU DIABETES PEDDLER ok gimme a large"
"Dang girl are you Die Hard on TBS because it looks like all the good parts are missing."
"I bet you the first person to invent puzzles was a woman that ripped up a picture of her husband."