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Joke of the Day

"Neighbors across the street have their Christmas lights up, so I invited them to my Easter Egg hunt this afternoon."

"TIL a man went in to have his right leg amputated but somehow they removed his left. After the mistake was corrected, he then sued but lost Judge said he didn't have a leg to stand on"

"Oral Sex: A taste of things to come"

"My ex-girlfriend got a parakeet, and that damn thing never shut up... but the bird was cool."

"In a way people that work in coffee shops are also First Responders. #Heroes"

"Doc and Alcohol Me: So Doc what is my problem? Doc: I am not exactly sure of the cause .I think it could be due to Alcohol. Me: That's ok i will come back when you are sober."

"What is the most religious unit in electrical engineering? Ohm."

"You hear Charlie sheen is starring on a new show. It's called Two and a half T-cells"

"What do you call a person who knows 3 languages? Trilingual. What do you call a person who knows 2 languages? Bilingual. What do you call a person who knows only one language? American."

"What goes all around the world but stays in one corner the entire time? Stamps!"