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Joke of the Day

"Went to a Trump rally in New Hampshire this week. Hard to describe the vibe, but ""what if the Nazis didn't care about fitness?"" comes close."

"My grandfather got new pants the other day. I asked him how they fit... He said ""Like a cheap castle."" Seeing the confused look on my face, he elaborated, saying, ""No ball room."""

"Why do the Lannisters have such big beds? They pushed two twins together to make a king."

"What did the barfly say to the other barfly? I saved you a stool."

"How many dead prostitutes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? More than three because the basement is still dark! *(Just heard this today, even though I know it's probably old!)*"

"What's blue and doesn't weigh much? Light blue"

"What's worse than having spiders on your piano? Having crabs on your organ."

"Q: Why don't they teach driver's education and sex education on the same day in Iraq? A: They don't want to wear out the camel."

"Manager: Twenty teams in the league and you lot finish bottom? Captain: Well it could have been worse. Manager: How? Captain: There could have been more teams in the league!"

"What do you call a sick bird who has crossed a national border without consent? An ILL-EAGLE! 2X COMBO"