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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the blacksmith that was arrested for creating iron calligraphy? He was charged with forging signatures."

"What's the best thing about having sex with twenty-six year olds? [NSFW] There's 20 of them..."

"Haven't been sleeping well, which is ridiculous cuz I have decades of experience"

"I don't know what to think of mountain-climbing. It has it's ups and downs."

"OLD SPICE: BECAUSE YOU WANT TO SMELL LIKE VICTORIA BECKHAM"

"Got caught up in a really great book last night... I didn't stop coloring till 2 o'clock this morning!"

"How do you put spaghetti to sleep? You cover it in peanut butter until it dies. My 4 year old made that up, along with a few others. Not sure how I feel about this."

"Did you hear about the pirate who got in trouble at work? He was reported to H-arrrrr"

"FRIEND: What 3 books would you have on a desert island? ME: My first book is more books. F: What? These aren't wish M: Second book's a TV."

"I finally got my TV show commissioned by the BBC. Its where we film inside the cockpit of an airplane. Were filming the pilot next week."