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Joke of the Day
"Things that are dangerous- -riding a motorcycle -sharks -riding sharks"
Next Joke
"how do you know asians have broken into your home? the dog is gone, the homework is done and they're still trying to get out of the driveway"
"""Pistorius"" sounds like a spell Harry Potter would have use to make someone's legs disappear. This is Frankie Boyles joke, not mine"
"mess with me and I will staright-up yank the drawstring out of your hoodie"
"Friend: Can I borrow a pen? Me: Sure! *looks in purse* *pulls out perfume, 17 Hershey kisses, a stapler & a baby goat* Me: Sorry, no pen. :("
"Tried to be sly and shove the whole cookie in my mouth without him seeing me. Then he turned around and asked me a question."
"What do you call the people who make sandwiches at Subway? Sub humans."
"Tiger, Lance and Tom walk into a cold bar... ""Heaters,"" the bartender cries in frustration, ""I told him to send me heaters!"""
"There is no such thing as Internet stalking. Stalking requires physical activity. Fun activity like softly brushing your hair at night Sarah"
"getting my loan approved at the bank by lying on my back and executing a series of flawless air kicks right there in the lobbby"