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Joke of the Day

"With Michael Phelps, Sarah Palin, and Glenn Beck here in Charlotte this week, my status as smartest guy in the room just rose exponentially."

"""Dammit"" or ""Damnit"" are both acceptable, unless you are over the age of sixty, in which case ""Dagnabit"" is required."

"I don't know about you guys... but I don't want Trump's trickle down economics...."

"A white male walks into a bar... Huehuehuehuehue"

"Top colleges are now offering a bachelors for mens hairdressing... ...but they call it ""manscape architecture"""

"My friends hate I when I use smiley faces. They're just childish xD"

"What did one eyebrow say to the other? H-eyebrow"

"I met a Japanese mathematician yesterday Japanese Mathematician: ""Acknowledge my presence, zero"" Me: ""Can you elaborate in mathematical terms?"" Japanese Mathematician: ""Notice me sin(pi)"""

"how many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? ten tickles"

"What do you get if you cross Socrates with a dentist? A flossopher!"