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Joke of the Day
"Hoping to get a 4k tv after Christmas. Making my new years resolution 3840 x 2160."
Next Joke
"What powerful reptile is found in the Sydney opera house ? The Lizard of Oz !"
"What do you get when you throw a grenade in a French kitchen? Linoleum Blownapart"
"How do you make an egg roll? Push it"
"Did you hear about the HVAC technicians who got into an argument? At first it was heated, but they got some fresh air then things cooled off"
"For a second I thought this cookie had raisins in it, but luckily they're just spider egg sacs."
"What do you call ravens trying to marry crows. Conspiracy to commit murder."
"Looks like my wife snuck a love note into my pocket which is pretty cute, although I don't know what ""DNR"" means."
"I'm excited for the zombie apocalypse so I can trap famous dead celebrities and make the best Broadway show ever assembled."
"I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back."