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Joke of the Day

"Q: How is Christmas celebrated in a Jewish home? A: They put parking meters on the roof!"

"Conversations get real after midnight. 11:59 pm - ""I love ramen noodles"" 12:01am - ""I feel like I can trust you. I killed a man once"""

"I tried to sell a Native American some land.... ...but he told me he had his reservations."

"There's this blind man feeling his way down the street. He walks past a fish market, you know what I'm sayin'? He stops, takes a deep breath and says: ""Ooooo Good morning Ladies!"""

"Why was the Planters employee fired? He was fucking nuts."

"What did Nicolas Cage say when his daughters grades came through? Oh God, not the B's!"

"Love is that really warm feeling that starts from the tips of your fingers and goes towards the bottom of your hand. Oh no wait that's glove"

"When an unattractive woman in a bar asks me my sign I tell her ""Stop."""

"Thousands of bird droppings are found on a playground.... Police suspect fowl play."

"A white guy, a black guy and a priest walk into a bar.. I immediately shoot the fucking nigger in his head, taking another dark coon out of the gene pool."