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Joke of the Day

"Man was rushed to ER after putting 4 plastic horses up his ass... After being treated, doctor described his state as stable"

"what type of music does a balloon hate? Pop music"

"Think of a good penis joke! Wait, I have a good one right on the tip of my tongue!"

"What did the Australian say to the hawk? Good eye!"

"How can you tell if a chemistry joke is shitty? If there isn't a reaction."

"What's the most well mannered dinosaur? A plesiosaur."

"Why is Princess Peach named after a fruit and Princess Daisy named after a flower? Because wanting to sound good is their OBJECTion"

"I want to start a potato chip company called ""dick's."" Our motto would tell you to eat a bag of 'em."

"People are like, ""Jess, can you give me some advice?"" & I'm like, ""K, don't get kidnapped."""

"""Congrats Lobster Boy, u got the job"" [Lobster Boy goes in for the handshake but cuts his employer's hand clean off]"