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Joke of the Day

"Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular?"

"Lost a couple FB friends overnight. Hopefully they just died and it wasn't something I said..."

"Just had a very thorough pat-down by a TSA agent. Now he wants to talk about my feelings, but I'm soooo sleepy."

"[job interview] ""any public speaking experience?"" not since the valedictorian speech in high school ""very impressive"" I yelled 'YOU SUCK'"

"Q: Why did the blonde keep a empty carton of milk in the fridge? A: In case she wanted black coffee."

"What would the gay guy's version of 50 shades of grey be? 50 shades of heeeeey."

"I go to the gym so infrequently that I still call it the James."

"What do you call an Aboriginal in a lamp? And Abori-genie."

"Why does C-3PO always tell Han the Odds? Because he can't even."

"A man gets pulled over by a female cop. He asks ""what seems to be the problem, officer?"", and the cop responds, ""oh, nothing."" EDIT: Weee, this is my first time on the front page."