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Joke of the Day

"Santa's sack is on the sleigh... Q.-Why is Santa Claus's sack so big and heavy ? A.-Because he only comes once a year, and when he does, it is down a chimney!"

"I usually prefer buffets to a la carte restaurants. Someone once asked me if I enjoyed Italian restaurants, and I said, I prefer Italiacan restaurants."

"What's better than winning the Paralympic gold medal? Not being in the Paralympics"

"So I called my urologist... Receptionist: ""Can you hold?"" Me: ""No...that's why I'm calling"""

"What's the best part about fucking twentythree year olds? There's twenty of them."

"Just read a book on Helium. Couldn't put it down."

"Q:What do you get when you cross a snake and a kangaroo? A:('A jump rope')"""

"Chinese parents give birth to girl [removed] Source: im a chinaman Edit: im a chinaman"

"When the internet is down I turn my bed into a make-believe boat and play Life of Pi with the cat"

"Why do programmers confuse Halloween with Christmas? Because 31 OCT = 25 DEC."