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Joke of the Day

"Have you ever met a person, & knew straight away that they were 'the one'? Yah. I had to take a restraining order out too."

"Did you hear about the guy who stole a dictionary from the library? He got away with words."

"Joke spy Why did the spy stay in bed? Because he was undercover"

"Why did the interrupting cow cross the road? MOOOOOO!!!!"

"I wanted to see lot of animals so I went to the zoo. But they only had one small dog. It was a SHIH-TZU."

"Did you hear about Princess Diana on the radio? and the windshield.. and the dashboard...."

"[court] LAWYER: Did u kill him? ME: No L: You know what the punishment is for committing perjury? ME [lips on the mic] Much less than murder"

"Artistic people of Reddit, what is being artistic really like? And can I get fries with that?"

"Do 90-year-old men wear boxers or briefs? Depends."

"What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my wiener in a car exhaust pipe"