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Joke of the Day

"A scuba diver brings a wetsuit to a dry cleaner..."

"How many IT professionals does it take to change a lightbulb? Have you tried turning it off and back on?"

"I don't hate my job. I just really enjoy curling up in a ball and sobbing under a blanket in the backseat of my car during lunch."

"What is Justin Timberlake's favourite Ukrainian river? The Crimea River."

"At the gun range I was at the gun range the other night with a friend. Friend: ""Aren't you going to wear ear protection while we're shooting?"" Me: ""Nah, my hearing's already shot."""

"Why do so many people like hanging out with Mr. Mushroom? Because he's a Fungi!"

"Why is Darth Vader's helmet so phallic? ...because when they hid Luke & Leia from him, they removed his force kin."

"What happens to male anarchists as they get older? They go from having anti-state issues to having prostate issues."

"Met a girl at a party and asked if she wanted to go back to my place and hang out. She said she wasn't a whore I said I wasn't offering to pay"

"My favourite sex position is the JFK I splatter all over her while she screams and tries to get out of the car."