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Joke of the Day

"Lake Superior really needs to lose the attitude."

"Why hasn't Nintendo released a Mario themed basketball video game? Because Japan isn't good at basketball."

"I was an alcoholic for seven years. Today marks my eighth."

"I bought some shoes from my drug dealer... I don't know what he laced them with but I've been trippin all day"

"My dog just attacked the pizza delivery man WHY ARE MY BEST FRIENDS FIGHTING"

"I met a girl with 12 nipples. Sounds funny, Dozen tit?"

"""At least your heart's in the right place,"" I say, softly running my hand across a translucent take-out container."

"Why did the semen cross the road? Because it was my first wank in two weeks."

"What did Sheldon say to Penny? BaZINCa!!"

"yo mama so stupid that when she enterd a stupid contest they said sorry no professionals."