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Joke of the Day
"Sorry I said your cat was ugly. Oh, and sorry for thinking your baby was a cat."
Next Joke
"I figured out why the plane crashed! There were skeletons driving it!"
"Fuck you, stupid ass crackers!!! Why won't you melt in my soup!?!?"
"Me: You ask so many questions that I want to stab a fork in my eye. Her: Why? Me: *stabs fork into eye*"
"I bought a book on eBay called ""How to Scam on eBay"". It still hasn't arrived."
"There must be a child in my rectum.... 'Cause you're kiddin' my ass!"
"There's nothing worse when I bring a girl home from a bar and she's in still in my bed the next morning That's when the smell of a corpse really begins to take effect"
"What do you call an alligator from India whose in charge of telling everyone what to do? A Deli-gator...I'll be here all week!"
"We're gathered here today to mourn the loss of Derek. His last words were ""Watch me try and keep my eyes open while sneezing!"""
"A fun prank if your roommate is a cartoon character is to draw clothes on the mirror so he leaves the house not realizing he's naked."