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Joke of the Day

"And how did you find your steak sir? Well quite accidentally. I moved this tomato slice and there it was"

"It's called Wal-Mart because the Center for Disease Control was taken."

"What do you call a clever joke that doesn't make it to the front page? A clever joke, but nobody will have Reddit..."

"If you say the words 'beer can' in a British accent, it sounds like you're saying 'bacon' in a Jamaican accent."

"Why does Luke Skywalker never have trouble getting laid? Because he always uses the force."

"What can think the unthinkable? An itheberg."

"Yesterday I was charged with kidnapping... That's the last time I fall asleep on a goat!"

"If you type in ""google"" in google search, it shows you pictures of your grandkids"

"What's the difference between a baseball and a fat girls pussy? You could probably eat a baseball."

"If you love someone let them go. If they come back they probly forgot their keys or something & yikes that's gonna be an awkward 30 seconds."