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Joke of the Day

"ME: [bumps man] MAN: [spills coffee] Say sorry ME: No MAN: Then I'll see you in court ME: [remembers I own a camouflage suit] You won't"

"What TV game show do fish like best? Name that tuna!"

"What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants? One is a crusty bus station, the other is a busty crustacean"

"For Christmas, I gave my wife a t-shirt and a dildo. I told her if she didn't like the shirt she could go fuck herself."

"St. Patrick's Day is like 420 for alcoholics."

"What is the radio operator's favourite romantic story? R and J"

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Safari Barbie ...with rifle pith helmet and pygmy guide"

"Why did the man throw away all the new pennies he had? Because they were a nuisance (new cents)."

"[OC] So did you hear about that harbour in Brazil that was infested with birds? I guess you could call it a Port-o-Geese."

"*accidentally grabs a fork from the silverware drawer instead of a spoon but I'm too lazy to go back so it takes me 47 min. to eat my soup*"