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Joke of the Day
"Postal workers are some of the most innovative people around They really push the envelope."
Next Joke
"I want to follow you back, really, I do. But the hash tags. My god the hash tags."
"Litter of puppies = cute. Liter of puppies = gross."
"6, holding a pic of me pregnant with him, ""Why are you SO FAT?"" Me, ""You're inside my tummy."" 6, ""That's DISGUSTING."" Me, ""It gets worse.."""
"What is the best thing about dating a homeless girl? You can just drop her off anywhere."
"I went up north to drill oil, didn't get payed Turns out, it was all rigged."
"Oh, I see you're an extrovert. Sorry, we can't be friends. I already have a friend who's an extrovert. One of you is enough."
"If someone's embarrassed just tell them an astronaut did the same thing. For example, ""It's ok, Buzz Aldren once shit himself in an Arby's"""
"Some of you keep touting donuts as the best breakfast food ..... But there are holes in your arguments."
"""Bite me, asshole"" - grammatically correct and scathing ""Bite me asshole"" - kinky pirate"