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Joke of the Day

"You could introduce a raccoon to a walrus as ""my Grandpa Steven,"" and neither would bat an eye. THAT'S WHAT'S SO GREAT ABOUT ANIMALS."

"Facebook has a link to ""Report a Problem"" so I wrote ""I'm not very close with my father."" Now we wait I guess"

"I heard Reddit likes puns so I posted ten of them thinking at least one would reach the first page no pun in ten did"

"My wife wants the living room walls to be something neutral. I'm painting Switzerland."

"Of course you can trust me with your secret. *Calls local news team"

"It's wrong! If gay marriage is legal who will stop me marrying this painting of a horse. This majestic painting. Who will stop me kissing it"

"Do you know why lions eat raw meat? Because lions don't know how to cook."

"What did terrorists say in Paris? ""Charlie has been neutralised"""

"You know the best thing about Midgets? They are really down to earth people."

"Fun Fact: Vegetarians live up to nine years longer than meat-eaters. Nine horrible, tedious, meaningless, worthless, meatless years."