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Joke of the Day

"What did one buttcheck say to the other buttcheck? After all the shit that has been between us, we will never be apart."

"Why did Frosty the snowman pull down his pants? He heard the snow-blower was coming."

"It smells like updog in this sub."

"My Welsh mate was found dead yesterday. He died the way he would have wanted to go... He passed away peacefully in his sheep"

"""Did you hear? Grandpa got burnt the other day."" ""How badly?"" ""Well they don't fuck around at the crematorium."""

"Operator: 911, what's your emergency. Me: I'm 33 and I tried to do a cartwheel."

"Did you hear about the man who choked on an issue of The Guardian after learning about his brothers passing? He found the news hard to swallow."

"Kudos to Mattel for making Barbie reflect the average woman! I'm buying the one with massive student loan debt & a fear of cement trucks."

"Which insect do asian people eat the most of? Lice"

"I was talking to my ex and she got the wrong end of the stick. The end that had been sharpened to a fine point."