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Joke of the Day

"Excuse me, here's your nose. I found it in my business."

"*Runs across campus to get to class on time* Whew! I made it! *Sits in the back and browses Twitter for an hour and a half*"

"This girl said ""she didn't know how I would take it..."" So I figured if anything I'd just give it back."

"*i got to get into bed but theres a walrus in there* *i ask him politely to move* *he wont move* *i have to sleep on the floor & im annoyed*"

"What do North Koreans lack that South Koreans do not? North Koreans have no Seoul."

"why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? to get to the same side."

"Did you hear about the constipated chancellor? He couldn't budge it :P"

"Traffic Two civil engineers were competing for a bid to do the road layout for a city. The engineer that lost accused the other of cheating, to which the winner said ""Roundabouts are fair play""."

"""Who ate all the crackers?!"" - racist cannibal."

"I gotta imagine one of the worst things you can do is shit your snowsuit."