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Joke of the Day

"Happy Greek Easter! Which Greek God loved to collect animals? Zoos"

"If the opposite of con is pro... ...the opposite of constitution has to be prostitution."

"I recently started remodeling my house and quickly got in over my head, so I decided to get some professional help. I also hired a contractor to work on my house."

"What's the difference between regular sex and anal sex? One makes your day and one makes your hole weak."

"Did you hear about the crew members of the USS Enterprise that needed help climbing into their bunks? They were hoisted by their own Picard."

"Why I don't watch science documentaries with my mum. Man on TV: Microwaves travel at the speed of light Mum: Fuck me, that's impressive. Microwaves are heavy."

"A drunk homeless guy wanted to fight me yesterday As soon as he kicked me and lost his shoe I could smell defeat."

"You know who are the best pussy magnets? Gynecologists.."

"Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key."

"*watching Dateline* wow this is the worst dating show ever"