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Joke of the Day

"I'm not rich like Jack don't have a mansion like Russell or have a Porsche like Martin but I do love you and want to marry you. I love you too but what was that you said about Martin !"

"What did the bird say when he flew over K-Mart? Caw Caw why'd my natural habitat get replaced with 165 000 square feet of consumerist wasteland lol"

"What's easier to get, aids or lung cancer? Depends what you smoke. (Not native speaker, sorry if it doesn't make sense)"

"Why don't taxi drivers talk to each other? They already know everything."

"Your brain has 2 parts! The left part where nothing is right and Right part where nothing is left"

"What do you call a girl that raps about women rights? Feminem."

"Why does Santa deliver all the presents Because it's for a good clause"

"What is the bird synonymous with abstinence The Swallow"

"What kind of jeans does mario wear? [Denim denim denim.](http://youtu.be/rdnTvgK2o5I) ^^^^^^shamelessly ^^^^^^stolen ^^^^^^from ^^^^^^tumblr"

"I will not rest until I've finished this nap!"