107891

Joke of the Day

"(Showing off new car) Father-in-law: Looks good, what engine has it got? Me: *ultra confident* a grey & black one"

"You matter Unless you multiply yourself by the speed of light squared. Then you energy."

"Her: YOU'RE A PIECE OF SHIT! Me: Well... at least I'm not all of the shit"

"Why does santa have such a large sack? Because he only comes once a year"

"Funny how many articles end in ""continued on page"""

"What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? I can't peanut butter my dick into your ass."

"Have you heard about the movie called 'Constipation'...? No? That's because it hasn't come out yet."

"How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the pyschopath"

"Me: *throws banana and waits for it to return, boomerang style* that's the last time I ever believe anything I read on Yahoo Answers..."

"Donald Trump was just issued a notice by the IRS Ordering him toupee up."