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Joke of the Day
"Why did the guitarist get life in prison? He fingered a minor."
Next Joke
"""LBJ"" was a president... Not a Spanish term for Hump Day activities."
"Car Talk So a transmission asks an engine, ""Yo Engine, hows things with you today?"" and the engine replies ""Oh you know, just another day in the hood..."""
"In mother Russia... How much woodchuck would a wood chuck if a wood could chuck woodchuck?"
"How is it that my kids can never find their own shoes but... Easily find the one ice cream sandwich I hid behind the peas in the freezer."
"If you try to rip somebody's head off, I suggest you train for it first. If you don't succeed it makes the following few minutes awkward."
"What do you call a droid that always takes the longest route? R2 Detour."
"Every time ""Cops"" comes on I'm like ""PLEASE don't show my episode."""
"Why didn't the Terminator upgrade to Windows 10? I asked him and he said, ""I still love Vista baby""."
"A man goes to the doctor... ...and the doctor tells him he has dyslexia. The man replies, ""Dyslexia? I just met her!"""