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Joke of the Day

"I may not be able to use by the ""N"" word... But at least I can say things like ""Hey Dad"", and ""Thanks for the warning Officer!""."

"Did you guys hear about that circus fire? It was in tents"

"I went through three magazines on a train yesterday. I'd killed a dozen people by the time they wrestled the gun off me."

"How many ninjas does it take to... Where did that lightbulb come from?!"

"There was supposed to be a BLM march today with up to a million people Although it's strange that I only count 600,000."

"I still haven't been able to deal with the fact that Jessica Simpson has had two children and didn't name either one ""Homer"""

"What do you call Sherlock Holmes when he's constipated? No shit Sherlock."

"A chickpea goes to a liberal arts college... What's its major? Falafelphy"

"Dogs were the first social justice warriors They hate mailmen."

"How can you tell there are two elephants in your fridge? You have to put the partly-eaten dismembered body of your infant daughter in the freezer instead."