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Joke of the Day
"If my husband asks, we took a lit course together in college"
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"How does Homer Simpson say watermelon in French? Melon D'OH"
"On date night my wife took me to a place where you make your own pottery. I made an urn."
"Q: What were Bill and Chelsea Clinton doing in the voting booth? A: Bill was giving his daughter a lesson in Civics how to ruin the people!"
"4-year-old: Can we have Oreos for dinner? Me: Are you crazy? That'd be terrible for you. 4: Mom's not home. Me: *eats Oreos for dinner*"
"I'm not single and I'm not committed... I'm simply on reserve for the one who deserves..."
"Count Dracula survived on the blood of 18 year old virgins for Millennia... He died last year."
"My wife asked me for a double-entendre.... .....so I gave her one."
"How many Dragon Ball Z characters does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one. But it takes five episodes."
"Why did Matthew Arnold go swimming before writing Dover Beach? Before writing the poem, he felt he had to do some sole-searching."