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Joke of the Day

"People find it fascinating I can lift 180kg from the bench. Weird, I thought people found it easy to stand up from park benches."

"What do you call spaghetti disguised as linguine? Faux-teccine"

"Why did the sheep move house? The neighbours were baaastsrds."

"Why you shouldnt vote for Hillary because Bill always chose someone other than Hillary, and you should too"

"What do you call a Chameleon that cant change colors? A reptile dysfunction..."

"What do you call a Mexican with a rubber toe? Roberto"

"Why are Canadian Jews so poor? Because there are no pennies to pick up off the ground."

"My chiropractor is open on Martin Luther King Day, which makes me wonder... does he value back history over black history?"

"For the last time big girls, a smaller dress size doesn't make you look smaller. Actually, it does the opposite."

"How does father Christmas get away with suing everyone? The Santa Clause"