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Joke of the Day
"Roses are red Violeta are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I"
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"My Level of Maturity Changes Depending On Who I'm With"
"Whats the difference between a zit and a priest? (My 17 year old camper just said this, made me cringe) A zit waits till you're a teenager to come on your face."
"What do engineers use for birth control? Their personality."
"Why didn't the fisherman go to Florida to fish for long jawed fish with rows of razor like teeth? He didn't have a Gar"
"Yo mama so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye."
"So when is too soon to ask your friend if you can borrow their baby to reenact The Lion King? One day old? Two?"
"My wife told me to take a spider out instead of killing it... We went out and had drinks. Cool guy, he wants to be a web designer."
"I installed a mirror in front of my toilet so that when I run out of things to read I will have someone to talk to."
"A Pokemon Go user walks into a bar.... He was too busy looking at his phone to notice it."