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Joke of the Day

"Girl1: Why are you so happy? Girl2: I was complimented on my driving today. Someone left a note on my windshield that said ""Parking Fine"""

"A doctor reaches into his smock to get a pen to write a prescription and pulls out a rectal thermometer. ""Oh, damn it,"" he proclaims, ""Some asshole has my pen"

"I think the government looks at Twitter and thinks 'This is WAY cheaper than Asylums'"

"Why was the priest also an imam? Double the prophet."

"Gay jokes aren't funny! I mean...Come on guys!"

"Why does Britain love tea so much? Because tea leaves."

"If you wake up on Christmas morning with a bad taste in your mouth Remember, Santa only comes around once a year to empty his sack."

"Why was 6 afraid of 11? Because 11 snaps people's necks with her mind."

"Why does the corn get mad at the farmer? Because he is always pulling on his ears."

"Why don't Australians have sex? Because they mate. ...I'll let myself out."