100344

Joke of the Day

"What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick. My dad used to tell me this all the time when I was little. Still makes me chuckle to this day."

"How does a Jew do the gardening? He moses lawn."

"I've caught you canoodling. You're really in hot water now. I can see tensions are boiling. Perhaps we'd better leave this issue in the pasta tense. Sieve and let sieve?"

"Why did the farmer cross the road? He was fucking the chicken."

"What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on him? Nothing. He just let out a little wine."

"What is the early 17th Century English word for having excrement and blood smeared on your forearms? fisticuffs"

"What did the elephant say to the naked man? How do you drink out of that little thing?"

"How to stop checking someone's Facebook page: 1. Delete your Facebook profile 2. Break your phone 3. Give away your laptop 4. Die"

"Poor Luigi when his parents were all, ""This is Mario, we also call him 'Super Mario'. And this Luigi, we also call him 'Player 2'."

"How does Moby Dick celebrate his birthday? He has a whale of a party!"