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Joke of the Day

"I bet Melania Trump really regrets buying a speech off Craigslist now."

"I regret to inform you that I've had better lays from a bag of chips."

"Did you hear about the blonde who stayed up all night to see where the sun went? It finally dawned on her!"

"What do you call an Egyptian spine adjuster? A Cairopractor"

"I asked this woman if shed join the membership gnomesayin"

"I had this nightmare that Salma Hayek and Kevin Hart were trying to tell me something at the same time and expected me to understand it"

"I wipe my counters with raw chicken breasts because I refuse to have weak children."

"Why do rednecks love Halloween? They get to pump-kin."

"I turned into a cat earlier. Don't ask meow."

"You're 16 and miss the 90's? Yeah, I'm sure those were the best 3 years of your life. Shitting in your pants and eating crayons."