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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Frenchmen and some toast? You can make soldiers out of toast!"

"Two ninjas are training in a field. One ninja says ""I'll bet you can't hit that that target with your throwing star."" The other ninja says ""Shur-I-ken."""

"I just quite my job at the helium factory. I won't be spoken to in that tone."

"Me and a buddy went to an amputee party It was crawling with pussy."

"How do Mexicans line up? Juan by Juan"

"From now on non fiction and fiction books shall be referred to as Fo Reals and Not Fo Reals. Pls pass along,"

"Independence Day was basically aliens blew shit up and then we gave them a copy of Windows and won the war."

"My kitchen timer broke..good thing I wasn't counting on it."

"What happens when Mario parks his car outside the wrong castle? He gets Toad"

"Wife: It's date night! Me: So, a movie, and... You still have that school uniform? W: Yes. *winks* M: Maybe you can get a student discount."