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Joke of the Day

"Black joke Q. What do black guys have that's double the size of white men and gets bigger every time they touch a woman? A. Their criminal record"

"China has revised its on child per family rule. It will now allow parents to have two children. Chinese parents were so excited, they let their kids have the day off work. Edit: Spelling is hard."

"I wanted to be a palaeontologist, but my parents said there was no future in it"

"I like sleeping with amish women that way i don't have to call the next day"

"Today I saw a bird shit on somebody for no apparent reason at all. Then I thought of you."

"*goku flies into the sunset* not knowing how the sun and earth really work he says ""WHAT THE HELL WHERE'S THAT SUNSET BEEN FLYING FOR DAYS"""

"Looks like my wife snuck a love note into my pocket which is pretty cute, although I don't know what ""DNR"" means."

"*therapist writes in pad* Me: Sometimes I feel like people don't notice me- *therapist jumps* Therapist: SHIT! HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN THERE?"

"Triscuits are a good snack if you've already eaten all the other snacks in your house and the boxes they came in and your own hands"

"What is the difference between a baker baking a cake and a gynecologist giving an exam? A few degrees."