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Joke of the Day

"I heard Matt Damon took it real hard when he heard Robin Williams died. I just hope he remembers. It's not your fault. It's not your fault..."

"The last time you got a piece of ass... Was when your fingers slipped through the toilet paper."

"What do you call a lesbian octopus? A lickalotopuss."

"Two bacteria walk into a bar... The bartender says, ""We don't serve bacteria here."" And the bacteria says, ""But we work here. We're staph."""

"Four Mexicans drowned over the weekend Newspaper headline: Quatro sinko"

"What happened when the girl dressed as a spoon left the Halloween party? No one moved. They couldn't stir without her."

"Why did the bean sell his car? The back seat didn't have enough legume."

"""Do not iron"" Like that was ever going to happen..."

"What's warm, white, and I drink almost every night? Warm milk before bed... Get your mind out of the gutter!"

"What do you call a stupid, yellow cow? A Moo-tarde !"