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Joke of the Day

"I got a thesaurus the other day, but all the pages were blank. I have no words to describe how angry I am!"

"What do mathematicians get if they stare at the roots of negative numbers for too long? Square eyes"

"What is it about public bathrooms that brings out the white supremacist artist in people?"

"I like Tweets that are so good that when I send them to FB my old friends won't talk to me on the phone for a week."

"The dark lord Saran has wrapped Middle Earth in 2-3 days of freshness."

"My car and I have one thing in common... ...we're both broke as hell."

"Knuckle tats: (M)(Y)(P)(A)(R)(E)(N)(T)(S) (W)(E)(R)(E)(R)(E)(L)(A)(T)(E)(D)"

"I had an uncle who was a drunk... tried getting him into other hobbies like sculpting but he was always getting plastered."

"Number joke as told by Yoda why 5 afraid of 7 was? because 6, 7 8"

"My friend always wants to talk about the scientific principle of buoyancy. It's not interesting to me, but hey, whatever floats your boat."