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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a drunken asshole? Alcohole."

"What's the difference between a doctor and God? God doesn't walk around thinking he's a doctor."

"A guy walks into a bar with a gun he says ""Which one of you bastards fucked my wife?"" and a small voice from the back of the room says ""You haven't got enough bullets"""

"What do you call a stoner dinosaur? A Smokealottapottapus."

"currently imagining a redditor choking on an uncooked hotdog and trying to wheeze out ""epic fail"" before losing consciousness"

"You know you're ugly when you call yourself ugly and no one disagrees with you."

"A Buddhist monk goes to a hot dog stall... and says ""make me one with everything""."

"My brother's dying wish was to get a joke into the front page of reddit But it seems rude to post a photo of him now that he's dead."

"Why couldn't the physicist get the Standard Model to work? Because it wouldn't commute!"

"Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because he saw the gas bill."