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Joke of the Day

"Angela Merkel arrives in Athens airport. ""Nationality?"" asks the immigration officer. ""German,"" she replies. ""Occupation?"" ""No, just here for a few days"

"Beyonce's birthday list: 1) The (former) planet Pluto 2) Maybach factory 3) The Taj Mahal 4) Lost city of Atlantis 5) Facebook"

"I quit my job and poured years into it Thanks to this recent Ebola scare, I can't ever release my online bowling game..."

"Nice hourglass figure, girl. Wanna come back to my place and stand on your head so my friends and I can keep time while we play Pictionary?"

"Yeah, sex is awesome. But have you ever put clothes on straight out of the dryer?"

"What did the duck say when he bought the chap-stick? Put it on my bill."

"Going to McDonald's for a salad is like going to a whorehouse for a hug."

"Stupid cats, can't even YOLO"

"Q: How do the Dallas Cowboys spend their first week at spring training? A: Studying their Miranda Rights."

"What is it called when Lebron James has sex? Bron-choitus"