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Joke of the Day

"For every person pleased at meeting their TC in real life. Another 762 are climbing out of bathroom windows and smashing their phone."

"Why do walruses just love a Tupperware party? They're always on the lookout for a tight seal."

"What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say upon being asked to star in a Broadway production about the world's greatest composers? I'll be Bach. Sorry."

"What does a parrot named Larry talk about? Vocabulary"

"The correct term for gluten-free, sugarless, vegan brownies is ""compost."""

"Why are spiders like tops ? They are always spinning !"

"How many babies does it take to open a door? It depends on how hard you can throw."

"Why did the zookeeper take a piss on the seel? He couldn't hold it."

"I wear my glasses to the liquor store in an effort to appear responsible."

"8:00am on a Saturday morning and my neighbor was mowing his lawn. Now he looks really funny covered in paint balls"