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Joke of the Day

"I ate a hermaphrodite lunch today... I had both a Ding Dong and a Yoohoo."

"Give a man a fish... ...and feed him for a day. Give a man to a fish, and feed it for like months."

"Why are atoms untrustworthy? They make up everything. Credit to /u/ipsokinetikon from an askreddit thread about what not to trust."

"I just discovered my new room mate is secretly a hard core racist and i wonder if should report him to the police. The dude takes part in illegal high speed car races at midnight"

"Why do women fake orgasms? Because men fake foreplay."

"Why can't you fool an aborted baby? NSFW Because it wasn't born yesterday."

"Hope they send us home early; I'm not sure how much longer I can pretend to work today."

"[OC] How to tell if you're gay... If when you fap, you like the feeling because there's a dick in your hand, rather than liking it because there's a hand around your dick - You're gay."

"What is a politician's favorite kind of tea? Infideli-tea."

"""Where'd my boomerang go?"" Under there ""Under where?"" Hahaha I just made you say ""underwear"" *boomerang hits me in the back of the head*"