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Joke of the Day
"Hey people who don't understand sarcasm, what's it like being so awesome?"
Next Joke
"Stephen Hawking walks into a bar haha just kidding"
"Two muffins are sitting in an oven... The first muffin looks over and goes ""man, it's really hot in here."" The second muffin replies ""HOLY SHIT! A TALKING MUFFIN!"""
"I'm the master at playing 'The floor is lava' *Lies on the couch*"
"Some of the weirdest looking Jehovah's Witnesses kept knocking on my door last night."
"Is your refrigerator running? Because I'd vote for it."
"I think Chris Brown should be a storm trooper in the next Star Wars. Maybe he can actually hit somebody."
"I always feel an intense awkwardness when a woman doesn't choose the iron in a game of Monopoly."
"What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster who got breast implants? One is a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean."
"Nostalgia isn't what it used to be..."