71445

Joke of the Day

"A skeleton walks into a bar... and asks for a beer and a mop."

"What do you call a bunch of Mexican stoners? Baked beans"

"Why did Tupac go to the gym? To get a sixpac! (Thank you 7th grade me)"

"Today's special menu The waiter asked, ""Would you like to hear today's special?"" ""Yes please,"" I smiled. ""Today is special,"" he replied, then walked off."

"A woman in labor is in pain and screaming profanity at her husband from her hospital bed. He says, ""Hey, don't blame me! I wanted to stick it in your ass, but N-O-O-O-O, you said that might hurt!"""

"Someone keeps sending me envelopes with cartoon dicks on them. I hate junk mail."

"bet i can make you wipe your screen"

"Yo Mama so dumb she put lipstick on her fore-head to make up her mind."

"You shouldn't kiss anyone on January 1st It's only the first date."

"Why did the stoner admire himself in the mirror everyday? Because he has a high opinion of himself"