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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a sudden fart? An institute."

"An alcoholic, a pedophile and a Catholic priest walk in to a bar and the bartender says... [""Oh, Father O'Bannon, you're alone tonight?""](/spoiler)"

"I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize."

"What's something that you can catch but not throw? feelings. T.T"

"Do you know why the ""deez nuts"" guy is in prison? He's nuts."

"An Imperial Roman soldier was wounded on the battlefield. His life was saved when he was time traveled to the modern world to be hooked up to an IV. He asked, ""What is that for?"""

"Why was Harry Potter hufflepuffed after his date with Hermione? She wouldn't let his ravenclaw slytherin her Gryffindor."

"All Canadians are hipsters because they all celebrated Thanksgiving a month before it was cool."

"Why was Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven was a Six offender."

"If the headline just read ""Kanye West Acts Like a Shithead,"" news sites could reuse it over and over again."